How do you find lasting love in a relationship?

venusMag: How do you find lasting love in a relationship?
Lasting love begins with learning to love yourself. Self-esteem is the basis of solid and mature relationships that last a lifetime.
We are all looking for someone who fits us perfectly. Someone with whom we could share a lasting love. Love, as we know, is often more complicated than at first glance.

Establishing meaningful and lasting relationships is not easy. The emotional, physical and psychological aspects are so complex that they make it difficult to put good intentions into practice. Moreover, we rarely have control over those aspects.

Sometimes you think it is only a matter of luck. That everything is determined by fate, or the people we meet. In reality, however, everything starts with you.

Tips to find lasting love

1. Love yourself

How do you find lasting love in a relationship?
Source:thepositivepsychologypeople.com

Some psychologists believe that when we feel that we need a long-term relationship, we are probably dealing with a different problem. And that problem is too low a self-esteem.

If we are desperately looking for someone who really loves us, the problem can come from within.

In these cases, it is best to take a critical look at your worldview. Ask yourself what you really need before making decisions under pressure. If you are confronted with a low self-esteem, then you are not actually ready for a stable relationship.

On the other hand, people with a high self-esteem do not constantly think about finding someone. They do not always need someone to love themselves.

2. Do not idealize love

Do not idealize love
In addition, the way we look at love can be another obstacle when it comes to finding lasting love. There are many preconceived ideas, prejudices and misguided cultural doctrines about what a relationship should look like.

  • “Find your prince on the white horse!”
  • “They lived happily ever after.”
  • “You are the only one for me!”

These are just some of the expressions that show this problem. The worst thing is, however, that sometimes we base our emotions on these stereotypes.

Unfortunately, in many cases and status it does not work that way. Every person has a different and unique perspective.

The dynamics of interpersonal relationships are also much more complicated than those we read in fairy tales.

3. Your partner is not an object

How do you find lasting love in a relationship?
Images: Pixabay

Your partner is not a thing
The combination of low self-esteem and infatuation almost always turns into an unhealthy emotion: jealousy. There are people who tend to think that a serious relationship means that they do everything their partner wants. That is of course not true:

In reality, building a relationship does not mean that someone is your possession. No man is someone else’s property.
every person is free even in a relationship, independent to make his or her own decisions.

one of uncontrollable factors that destroyed many relationships that you can imagine is jealousy. A sustainable relationship means that you learn to mediate and negotiate, so that everyone feels free, respected and loved.

4. Learn to deal with crisis moments

How do you find lasting love in a relationship?
Credit: Pixabay

Long-lasting love has many stages. That means that not everything will go perfectly.

Sexual attraction, being in love and starting a relationship are just a summary of everything that happens when two people are together.

People who have had long relationships will certainly confirm this. Crisis moments are an important part of every relationship, because you can emerge stronger from that crisis.

Staying together after a crisis creates a deep bond between you and your partner and makes the relationship stronger and stronger.

In order to get through a crisis, however, the solution can not simply be based on what only one person wants. Before you focus on what you want from your ‘other half’, you have to wonder what you can do to make everything better.

Lasting love is a kind of love that makes you better
It is easier to enter into a relationship and fall in love with the beginning of the relationship. We are influenced by intense hormones and high expectations. However, it is difficult to continue the same intensity over the years.

Persistent relationships are those in which love is nurtured as the years go on. Stay tender, show understanding, and demonstrate your affection regularly.

A lasting love requires a balance between pleasure and discipline.

Another way to feed love is to learn to move yourself in the other person. Avoid unnecessary quarrels. Choose active negotiations instead.

No one claimed that everything would go naturally

Finally, you must remember that it will not be easy to meet someone. Let alone that you marry him or her straight away or start a long-term relationship.

So you have to pay attention to a number of vital aspects:

  • Psychological
  • Emotionally
  • Spiritual
  • Morale
  • Sexual
  • Social

That does not mean, however, that lasting love is impossible to find. If you work hard then it pays a lot. Fortunately, it is all worth it if you can find the right person.

After that, however, the real work begins: learn to understand each other’s differences and build on your relationship.

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